Lovely dream, interrupted

I was having a wonderful dream early this morning when it was interrupted by a vomiting child. Thankfully, PJ is now old enough to know what's happening. So, I got him on the floor with a bowl. Most of it ended up in his bed. So I moved him to the living room, and Em into my side of the bed.

Now we are watching Over the Hedge and drinking coffee (well, just me on that one). Thinking about breakfast...and NOT thinking about breakfast.


Went to Lauren's on Friday night. Ro was up to get her car looked at. Us ladies went to Kahn's BBQ for dinner. Almost killed each other on the way there, like only sisters can. LOL - yeah, I can only laugh now that it's over. :) Got to play the new Wii Sports. Worth buying I do believe. Will have to purchase a new Wii though.

Yesterday, the boys and I went to New Richmond. Did laundry. Had Dairy Queen with Grandma. Had a nice game of Baseball going on with Grandma and Uncle Pete. The boys wanted to stay the night, but I did not. So we left around 7pm, hit Mickey D's for dinner, and wandered home.

Had to moved several children at once around 3am, but that was it until the Wake Up Call. He seems to be doing OK now - well, at least no fever and no complaining. I think I may have been phlegm-induced and not Flu Related. *crosses fingers*

Gonna go snuggle with the sicko and drink massive amounts of coffee.

It's been a while.

I've been more into writing. It's consumed me. :D

I'm, of course, in a bit of a funk now. As per my psyche. It's my own fault this time. Stupid me.
My cure-all would be to spend a day shopping at the MOA. REAL shopping, not window. But that won't happen any time soon. Hell, I can't even do it after tax return season this coming year. Again: My own fault.


Had some tragedies arise in the last couple of months. A close-close friend was admitted into the hospital for depression. Very scary time. I worry so much about this person. I wish I was closer. Just to reassure and give lots of hugs. I know they need them as much I do. I wish I could be strong enough for the both of us, then they wouldn't have to suffer. STUPID BRAIN AND ITS CHEMICAL IMBALANCES!

Also, a friend lost her 13 year old daughter in August. She had a genetic disorder and passed away after surgery to remove a benign tumor from her brain. I cannot even fathom the pain, heartache, and loss she's still going through. Her family is putting on a benefit for her next weekend. I'm hoping to make it down there.


I Finally have another friend that has children the same age as mine. (No offense to you that do not!!!) Her eldest boy is a half year older than than Em and half year younger than PJ, and they like the same things. Again, she's so far away. Damnit.


Went to the Ren Fest and State Fair this year. Had more fun at the Ren Fest. The State Fair is blah and there's just too many people. Pisses me off!! Of course this may be due to the fact that the same day we went was the same day Mike lost his job.

Mike was working for BostonScientific. It was awesome and he LOVED it. And then the asses at the temp service dropped him like a rock. Bastards! Anywho. So that's added some tension into the mix.


The boys are OK - physically. PJ is in super-psycho mode tho. He has to scream and hit everything and everyone. He's even picking on the cat! His new word is: Accident. So he claims that everything he does is one. *sigh*


Em started 2nd grade. And so far no "incidents". We've gotten him to actually swallow pills now, so I don't' have to plunk down $84 a month for a bottle of his meds (in liquid form). Now it's just $10. Very nice. He has a bit of a cold at the moment and I'm just waiting for a note to come home from school telling us to get him tested for the Swine Flu. LOL - which I actually think both the boys had it earlier this summer. I'm not worried.


Next weekend Carmen and her fiancee are coming up! I can't wait. I haven't seen her in at least 2 years, maybe more. Now if only I can see Jenny and Ali sometime soon, I'd be set. :(



And finally, per usual, I'm having self-esteem issues. This time it's mostly weight related. I know I'm up over my Do or Die limit. (As it: DO IT OR I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF - not literally.) It's just so hard to find the TIME. Or the energy. Two small boys that wake up at the crack of dawn and go to bed when the rest of the World has been sleeping for 8 hours....I HAVE NO TIME! NO TIME! It's very frustrating. Add on top of that a husband who only thinks of himself, not even his CHILDREN first...it's a suicidal offense. I'm disgusting, everyone thinks I'm disgusting, and I won't be able to get what I want (really really REALLY want) until I do something about it. And, to my brain, apparently it doesn't matter. *punches brain* I've started to not go out anywhere or anyone. Usually I'm the one that makes the effort. I'm the one traveling to see friends or family. But I've stopped. Life is too embarrassing now.

Ho-hum. Blah blah blah. Buy a girdle and qwit-cher-bitchin' I know I know.

It's been a while...

Went to the Ren Fest yesterday. Met up with Ro, Cindy, Gracii, and Bill (Gracii's hubby). Wandered around for a bit. Burned my tongue on some soup in a bread bowl. Wandered some more, then had to sit through the Tortuga Twins show. *snore* So not funny. Old gay guys prancing around on stage is nothing new. Wandered a bit more, then went and found Faith and her Clan. Had a much better time with them. Wandered a bit more with them, saw the Tori Seller. Very funny!! Then watched a "show" between the Jester and the guy in the hanging cage. Another funny show. Then was going to meet up with Ro again, but I'm not sure what really happened there and she said she WASN'T going to meet me. Got confused and pissed off so I left. Then she's calling me and texting me cuz she lost her camera. I'm not sure WHY I was surprised. *sigh* THEN she texted me to let me know someone just found her CELL PHONE. WTF?!? She lost it within the 5 minutes I had be talking with her.

Grrrrr....so by then I was glad to be leaving. Had a massive headache. Stopped for dinner. Made it home. Mike escaped. And I ended up going to bed at 8:30. Slept until 7:30. Very nice!

I really missed being sociable with adults with whom I do not work with.

On a sad note, I learned that Jess's Great Piranese, Tristan passed away yesterday. I'm so sorry, hon. :( He was a good dog.

Too much stress, Sick Babies, and Shopping

This week, I've know THREE children who have had surgeries on their heads. One was major brain surgery to remove a tumor. She isn't doing well. She went into Cardiac Arrest early Saturday morning. She's in a coma, the docs say it doesn't look good. She's 13.

Work has been un-Godly busy this week. The majority of our office staff was out on vacation so it was up to Bonnie and I to take over. Even IF everyone had been there this week it would have been Hell. Such is life. We survived.

Friday evening Lauren and I picked up Faith and went to The Nova. Had a nice relaxing dinner. It was good to get out.

Saturday got up, went to breakfast with the family. Did some shopping, came home and slept while Mike and the boys went to a birthday party for one of his young cousins. Ended up going up to Albertville with Lauren after I woke up. Had a nice, controlled spending, evening.

Not sure what's going up today. Maybe more sleep.

Saturday

Got woken up way too early yesterday. Managed to escape for a bit even tho Mike was super-ass crabby with everyone. Hit Northtown. Needed to get to BB&W and then Maurices. Got a pair of $50 Hydraulic jeans for only $9.99 from the clearance rack. Awesome! Then went to Borders but didn't find anything for me, just the boys.

Came home, packed up everyone, sent Mike to bed, and we made our way to Owatonna for Tanner's bday party. Had a good time, met lots of babies (two Camerons and an Easton... please don't ask, I don't know why they named their kid after a Cardinal Direction *sigh*). Lots of nice peoples and got to see old friends (except for two, which makes me sad). Managed to stay until about 7:30-ish, then rumor came to me that Em was calling some of the other kids "f-er"...but the real word. So, off we went into the car, me yelling the whole time.

Made it home by 9pm. Got the boys into bed and read until Midnight. PJ's small cough has turned into a yucky, wet cough. Must stay away from peoples for a bit. Except we HAVE to do laundry today. I hate "wasting" all the money, but gotta have clean undies I guess. :(

Keep Forgetting

Um, I keep forgetting to blog. I read everyone else's but mine. LOL

First, I want to give a shout out to Dreadie Woman. I miss you. I'm thinking of you. And I hope you feel better soon. Love you very much, hon. *hugs*

Secondly, Lauren had her baby. Woo! Emma Grace was born on 7/2/09. She's beautiful and looks almost like her brother...and the Schwan's guy. ;)

Went to Project Earth at the end of June. Had a good time. Slept in a super small tent, ate some super wicked/yummy brownies and just relaxed. I had a very nice time.

After two full weeks on the job, Mike was transferred. They called him on Friday morning saying he was to start in Plymouth this coming Sunday. Hmmmm...they said they were "slowing down". At least they transferred him and didn't give his ass the boot. *crosses fingers*

Work's been...work. This past week was hard. I was super PMS woman, so anything anyone said to me almost made me cry. Friday was the worst. I hate that. My boss kept trying to ask me what was wrong, etc....and I couldn't answer cuz he was making me cry because of his concern. LOL

Anywho, I'm sure there's more but my brain isn't functioning correctly. Was super tired this morning, thanks to Aunt Flo so I had to nap. Then we met up with Mike's parents in Maple Grove. It was their annual city celebration or whatever. Had a good time. Lots of pictures posted on FB if you're interested. We stopped at Mickey D's for a quick dinner (mine consisted for 4 Advils, again Thanks Aunt Flo). Came home, took the boys to the pool for about 40 minutes. Froze our butts off, came home, ate another dinner, and tossed them into bed. I'm heading there soon...maybe.

Cry-Day

Anything anyone has said or done to me today has me almost in tears. I don't get it. THe children are the worse! We went grocery shopping at Super Wal-Mart and they were horrible like urchins. We went swimming at the Anoka Aquatic Center...and the broke every rule there was.

I woke up this morning with a my right tear duct swollen. Not sure HOW or WHY, but it was. It's slowly gone down as the day has gone on, but I feel my left on going now too. *bashes head*

Have to take the boys back to the pool this evening. I'm so tired. Already took one nap, can't take anymore. Mike has to stay up all night to go to work tomorrow.

2-F'ing-90

Tuesday I Woke up with my weird shoulder/neck ache again. I yoga-stretched all morning and even drank two bottles of water and it took until lunchtime to go away. That wiped me out, so I took a great nap during lunch. (Even woke myself up twice from snoring!)

Mike called the BostonScientific people yesterday. He was supposed to hear back from them sometime last week or this week. They told him that it would be "a couple of more weeks" before the call. Grrrrr.... At least I know I'll have someone to watch the boys for P.E. weekend now.

This morning (Wednesday) I woke up with super-mega cramps. What's the deal with all the pain this week?!

Having severe stress and panic issues again. Not going well with that. $ issues, of course, are #1. Family hating me is #2. Lauren's baby is #3. I don't want another early baby. No food or gas is #4.

Let's party. *sigh*

Lastly, before I went in to have my foot frozen on Thursday, they weighed me. 2-fucking-90. Holy god, I'm a mother fuckin' cow. No wonder I feel like shit all the time. I want to do something about. I have PLANS to do something about, but guess what?! It's all going to cost me $$$. Can't join a gym. Can't buy a bike (which I really really really want). Can't go on a specialize diet. I'm pretty sure I don't qualify for GB, and even if I did it still seems a bit extreme. I just don't know how to combat this.

I guess that's it for now. If I go on you'd want to kill yourself.

Morning of Hell

I guess it's not any different than any other morning. Just more of the same. Em would NOT stop talking. And PJ would NOT stop crying. He threw a fit for 20 minutes because I wouldn't give him any pop for breakfast. *sigh*

The foot is doing OK...I guess. The pain has diminished and the swelling is down, but it's still too tender to walk on properly. I hope that that next time I see my doc I get an "I'm sorry." or something.

And, so begins another work week. The only thing I have to look forward to is Project Earth, which I can't tell anyone I'm attending or else be lashed and disowned. :(

Still no word about Mike's job either.

Grandma's Party

Grandma O'Reilly turns 90 on the 13th. We had a party for her yesterday at the home she lives at. I keep forgetting how frail she is. And not the robust, stand-tall woman I knew as a child. She's wheelchair bound, she shakes, it take her a while to talk...but she was very grateful for the party. She said it was a perfect day.

The Foot Story

In the summer two years ago, I noticed I had a plantars wart on my right foot. About two inches below my pinky toe. So, I went to Wal-Mart purchased the standard Wart Remover Disc Set, or whatever, and started the treatment. Once it was finished, I let it heal up. The following summer I noticed I now had TWO warts. So, I headed to Wal-Mart and bought another Standard Wart Remover Disc Set, and started the treatment.

From there, my colony bloomed into EIGHT warts, including one on my big toe. *head desk* So much for "home removal". This this February I went to my doc and his got out his cool propane-torch-like can of Liquid Nitrogen. After that horrifically painfully experience I was supposed to go back in three weeks to have another treatment. Well, the after pain was so terrible I didn't go back until May. This 2nd treatment wasn't as bad, but still hurt. I knew what to expect. The after pain diminished after only two days.

This time, being the "responsible" adult (go ahead, laugh), I went back in after the allotted 3 weeks. I did notice that the skin underneath the callus was new and pink, but never thought of what that would mean when the "torch" would hit it again.

YOWSERS! So much pain!! But, I made it through and got a lovely perscrip for some Tylenol and Codeine. When I woke up the next day (Yesterday, in fact) I could barely walk on my foot, and noticed the pinky toe was a bit puffy. I didn't really think anything of it and put a sock on and attempted to get my shoe on. I failed. So, I left the shoe off and went to work. Now, after the last two sessions I'd leave my shoe off while at work for the day. Thankfully our office is carpeted and everyone understood I was hurting.

Well, once at work my pain was so great (without the shoe AND the sock - it hurt to even have the sock on) that I went to the bathroom and cried. I've NEVER cried when I have been in pain. This was 1000x more painful than having my babies. It was then I noticed my pinky toe has doubled it size. Hmmmm....but like a trooper, I bucked up and went back to my desk.

All this time I was texting Ro and Lauren about my foot and both of them kept telling me to call my doc, call my doc, call my doc. So finally, at lunch I made the call. Instead of having me talk to my doc they sent me to a triage nurse, where she proceeded to tell me to either go to the ER or find an Urgent Care that was open. There was something wrong.

So, I hobbled back into the office and told my boss I needed to leave for a few hours (all this time Lauren was looking up Urgent Cares in the area, bless her). It was a bit difficult to ask because we were already down a person that day because John was on vacation. But, seeing as I was TOLD to go I went. Lauren found me an awesome Urgent Care just up the road and I went.

There were only two people in front of me, and I only waited maybe five minutes. Got in and waited maybe 10 minutes for the doc. When she came in she had me get up on the table, she bent over, looked at my foot and said: "COOOOOOOL!" The freezing process creates a callus immediately and my callus is about 2" x 2". Which makes it that more painful.

Seriously, she was so funny! (And she had the most bad-ass laptop in the world, but that's another story.) She poked my foot and suggested she scrap off the callus to relieve some of the pressure that was pushing on the blood blister the freezing creates (which it's supposed to do). While she was doing that we chatted and she poked about some more. She said she was going to give me a perscrip of Antibiotics just incase. If the swelling didn't go down by tomorrow (which is today now) then I should start taking them.

And then she noticed the scratch on the top of my foot. "What's this?" she asked and pointed to a 1/2" wide red line curving up my foot.
"Oh, I was scratching my foot just before you came in. They're just scratches."
"Really? You scratched in a curved line?"
"Um, yes?"
"Show me! Scratch your foot for me."
*scratches my foot* "Huh, ok. I guess I didn't make that line."
"Welp! You're getting antibiotics. Thank you foot." She patted my foot.

I like her, she's weird! :D

She drew on my foot to indicate where the line stopped and where the swelling should not pass. If either went past the lines I'd have to go to the ER for sure. I did have to get a tetnus shot though cuz I didn't remember when I got my last one.

She brought me a perscrip for 875mg of Augmentum that I could get out of the Med-ATM - the 2nd coolest machine in the world next to her laptop.

In the lobby of this clinic they have an ATM like machine that dispense prescription medications. How sweet is that?! They give you a sort of pin number and it spits out your meds. So cool...

Oh, the doc also told me I wasn't supposed to go back to work and gave me a written "note" for my boss. But, I knew I'd have to go back. I'd already rigged up a system to keep my leg elevated and used my desk chair as a wheelchair of sorts. Bonnie was also super nice enough to get most of my stuff off the printers and what not. Anywho, I went back to work (for my boss, Terry, had to leave at 4pm to attend his son's high school graduation). It's all good. I ended up staying until 5:45pm.

Mike also brought me the Family Crutches. This is the first time I've ever had to use them...Crutches SUCK! I have no back or arm strength to use them and they keep getting caught on my bra! LOL

This morning now, is down to half its length. The pain isn't as bad and I slept like a ROCK last night.

That's my Foot Story. May you all learn from it.

Me again

I'm going to give this another chance but not making the same promises I made in my last one. Life is life and this is about me living the life that was dealt to me to my best.

No promises.